Humpdays 17

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Book II: Seeing Reds, SSW vs. Walkiria.




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Olga had been told that her first time at Hyper Con would be chaotic, but no amount of caution would have adequately prepared her. Besieged Leningrad seemed calm in comparison. One things she was eternally grateful for was that she and Walkiria could fly, since parking for the event seemed nightmarish from overhead. Once they arrived at the Angel Falls Convention Center she found herself suddenly surrounded by hundreds of con-goers in incredibly (miles?)long lines, some of them dressed in extremely elaborate costumes. It felt as if she was wadding through a dizzying photo-session that took place every 10 feet in the main convention hallway. There were people costuming as television or comic book characters to be sure, but most of them were dressed up as their favorite Angel Falls resident. A quick glance around the entrance showed her two Mindy Marvel's, a Fantastic Lin, someone with an intricate Kim Paler (involving PVC pipes and wire-frame), Sausage, Ultrawoman and an incredibly detailed Warbuster armor. Almost immediately both she and Walkiria were mobbed for autographs and photographs by eager fans. It was all very disorienting. Not that she and Maia hadn't done autograph sessions before, just never surrounded by so many people and in such a tight place in comparison. That and she still had the events of last week re-playing in her head. Maia was flexing with two girls dressed like aliens when she looked over to see the frown that had formed on Olga's face.



"What is it babe?" Walkiria asked her in a hushed tone, but it was still fairly loud considering she still wanted Olga to hear her over the din all around them.



"I am still thinking of last week and how I may have made a terrible mistake."



Maia took a few steps towards her and placed her gloved hand, hot, upon her back. She leaned in to whisper to her. "Look, I took you out here to get you away from all that. You've been beating yourself up all week and unnecessarily. David gave you a bad hand and you played it the best that you could hon. You did what you thought was right."



"But what if I was wrong?" Olga whispered back, "What if I should have kept those powers and used them to do so much more?"



"You can't spend you life second-guessing it. Maybe you could have, maybe it would have made you into something like Concussion. I know it's not the first time you had to make a call with no right answer. Sometimes there is no right answer. Look over there!"



Maia suddenly pointed through the crowd of people to a large, muscular man dressed in only a pair of black leather pants, boots and a bikini top(?), with his short blonde hair slicked back.



"I think he's cosplaying..."



"What?" Olga interrupted, not knowing that word.



Maia started over again, still pointing. "I think he's dressed up as Genocide. How do you think she'd feel to see a big dude looking better than she does?"



Olga chuckled and covered her mouth with her gloved hands. "Why would someone dress up as Genocide? I do not understand."



"You should avoid the internet porn surrounding her then. She's the poster girl for Female Muscle Growth.com and Brawny.com. Nightmare fuel." Maia replied with a wink.



"How do you know this?" The Russian heroine asked aghast.



Maia shrugged, "I have my own fans and devotees on those sites as well. You get used to it."



The Soviet Superwoman arched an eyebrow and took a step to the left, shaking her head softly and continuing to sign autographs, take photos and answer questions. The idea of men sexually aroused by that Nazi just scared her. A few moments later someone who worked for the Hyper Con rounded up a few ladies who were all dressed as Soviet Superwoman and brought them over to meet their idol and pose for a group photo. Olga had to admit that some of their costumes were incredibly like her own. One of them had her black and white costume (and a great build for it), while another choose to come as battle-damaged SSW complete with strategic tears, holes and fake blood. One of them broke down into tears upon meeting her, a situation both very flattering and awkward. Walkiria was getting a great deal of the same treatment as well only a few feet from her. The line eventually flowed out into the exhibit hall where the dealers were located. There were comic books galore, obviously. A mini arcade. Even art depicting cats dressed as superheroes. There was even a life-size General Bardak completely made out of Lego. It was all still so bewildering to Olga (especially when she spied the oversized image of herself adorning one of the walls), but she smiled and continued to meet and greet with her fans. And the costumes. There were so many of them! Just then she felt a hand on her shoulder and another rubbing the muscles of her arm. Looking over revealed a thin man with a lustful look painted across his face, his lips pulled back in a gasp. He pressed close against her and she could feel his manhood poked against her leg. Whatever cologne he was wearing was highly aggressive to her nostrils.



"So big..." he whispered to himself.



Olga got ready to push him off of her and say something when suddenly the man let go and disappeared into the crowd as quickly as he had appeared. Maia was immediately next to her, hands on her hips.




"Creeper just did that shit to me too." the red-haired heroine exclaimed.




Several fans noticed the uncomfortable exchange and offered to find the guy and do various things to him for them. Maia cracked up and held her hands up, thanking them for their colorful suggestions but that she and Olga were fine.



"Always at least one asshat, right hon?" Maia smiled and winked at her. "It could have been worse, he might have been Twisted Savant."



"Who says he was not?" Olga replied and Maia burst out laughing.



The rest of the day at Hyper Con was highly fun and eventful, without much more of the creep factor (although Olga admitted to herself that some of these fans and con-goers could use a trip to the showers AND she avoided a few vendors that sold images of her in a less than flattering light). She met several celebrities, some of them A-list such as Robert Downey Jr., Patrick Stewart and Joss Whedon (who expressed interest in directing a film about her life) to others that she was not as familiar with like Robert Englund, Sam Jones and the original Boomer from Battlestar Galactica. In fact, Maia spent a great portion of the day explaining to her who most of the celebrities were and what shows or films they had done. Ultra-Man was here and she and Maia ran into him and struck up a conversation with the handsome Angel Falls hero. At one point, both she and Maia were asked up on stage in one of the halls and made official Hyper-Con guests of honor . They both answered a few questions from a packed audience ( or non question in the case of: “Oh my God. I love you. I’m such a big fan. I’m sorry, I just need a minute. Oh God! Oh God! I completely forgot what I was going to ask.”) before staying for more autographs and even more photos. By the end of the afternoon, both heroines looked like they had just gone five rounds with Ultrawoman.



They made their way over to a superhero-themed burger joint across the street called Guardians Galley, still bustling with costumed con-goers and managed to find an out of the way booth in which to eat (after a few more autographs and a plea to the crowd to please let them eat). Maia ordered the Firebrandi jalapeno burger and Olga ordered her namesake, a cheddar BLT burger with Russian dressing.



"If I could have told my parents the things I would see one day, they would have locked me away." Olga chuckled between bites of her sandwich. "Never have I been to such a place as that before."



"And that was on Day 5." Maia replied. "most of those folks stay for the whole week. It's comic book, sci-fi Mecca for a lot of people."



Olga shook her head. "The amount of knowledge these fans know is staggering."



Maia nodded, "You mean the guy in cargo pants who knew every detail about us and monologued it back to us rather than ask a question, yeah that was odd. You have to remember though, these guys are meeting their idols. They have Soviet Superwoman posters, t-shirts, lunchboxes and video games..."



The Soviet Superwoman's telephone rang, cutting off Maia and prompting her to pull it out and look at the number. It was unknown. Olga answered it with a hello, cupping her other ear with her hand to deflect the ambient sound all around her.




"I take it I am addressing the Soviet Superwoman, Mrs. Olga Yezhov?" came the voice on the other end. He spoke to her in Russian with what she perceived as a Central dialect.



"Da, who is this?" she answered back in her native tongue. Maia had picked her sandwich back up for another bite, but instead only held it a few inches in front of her as she listened.



"My name is Nikola Myshkin. It is very important that I meet with you in the next couple of hours. What I have to discuss with you is a matter of national security and time is of the essence."




"Where are you?" Olga asked, her tone serious.




"You can find me at Taynitsky Garden in Moscow exactly five hours from now, near Cosmos. I would appreciate it if you came alone as what I have to say is only for your ears and as I said, national security."




"Alright, I will be there." Olga replied just before the man bid her good day and disconnected from the call.



"Who was that?" Maia asked, having watched her wife's expression change from good natured to serious.



"I do not know yet." was the raven-haired woman's reply.



To be continued...

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Soviet Superwoman is my creation and property
Big thanks to for usage of her iconic Walkiria character and property.
LOTS of mentions of familiar AF faces in this one!
Hyper Con brought to you by and

This story takes place in the universe.